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Author Topic: Attack of the Snow  (Read 791 times)

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Offline Shadow

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Attack of the Snow
« on: February 27, 2013, 09:30:48 pm »
So here I am driving down highway minding my own business and going under an overpass. When all of a sudden a plow or truck decides to launch an attack of snow on my car. As it was a surprise attack I was momentarily blinded by the sudden onslaught of deadly snow. As I recovered from my near heart attack and got it wiped out of my view, I thought the worst was over. Only after did I notice that intermixed in the assault of snow was the true weapon of the assassin. A deadly ball of ice had struck down on the passenger side of my windshield, causing a nice crack from the bottom to around 3/4 up and several smaller ones in the corner.

All this after getting hit by two blizzards in the past week that each dumped nearly a foot of snow on me. It was a deadly attack but Old Man Winter's attempt to assassinate me has failed. Maybe next time, Old Man Winter, maybe next time.

* Shadow declares war on winter
« Last Edit: February 27, 2013, 09:33:08 pm by Shadow »
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Offline Jenne

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Re: Attack of the Snow
« Reply #1 on: February 27, 2013, 09:32:56 pm »
* Jenne supports this DoW
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Offline Arsenal 10

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Re: Attack of the Snow
« Reply #2 on: February 27, 2013, 09:48:44 pm »
Winter is coming has finally fucking arrived.
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Offline Ogaden

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Re: Attack of the Snow
« Reply #3 on: February 27, 2013, 09:53:33 pm »
I shall be burning fossil fuels to support your glorious crusade
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Offline Leo

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Re: Attack of the Snow
« Reply #4 on: February 27, 2013, 10:36:29 pm »
White on black violence. When will this country ever learn?
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Offline Buck Turgidson

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Re: Attack of the Snow
« Reply #5 on: February 28, 2013, 12:33:09 am »
That was my driver, my plow, and my snow.  So let me give you another perspective:

My driver was minding his own business, moving my snow around like I asked him, and some shitty ass excuse for a car jumps into the plow stream, and makes off with some of my snow.  Broad fucking daylight, zips in, zips out, and makes off with MY snow.  MY SNOW.  Cahunas, I admit.

I was about to fire my driver until I read your admission.  What did you think, this would be a victimless crime?  Well as it turns out there is such a thing as divine justice - we recovered the snow half a klick away, and your windshield is cracked. 

I wish for you to take this turn of events as a warning, because your next such "accident" will be the last one.
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Re: Attack of the Snow
« Reply #6 on: February 28, 2013, 09:49:36 am »
Quote from: Shadow on February 27, 2013, 09:30:48 pm
* Shadow declares war on winter

your main opponent will be the snow plow/snow blower lobby. Advise you invest in some bodyguards, or perhaps consider temporarily relocating to guatemala... their power wanes the closer you get to the equator
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