You used to be cool, but tonight your acting like "angry Flask". Can't you go back to the old you? or at least "happy flask"?

Can I bribe you to do a little webhosting for me?

Tonight's the night! Her heart jumped and her ***** twitched as she crossed off the date on the calendar. As she prepared her morning coffee, Melissa noticed her hands were shaking. How on earth was she going to make it through the day? The anticipation could kill her.

It was just a day; but what a day -- Jason would be here tonight. They would be together at last. No more "I love yous" down the phone; no more aching loneliness at the sight of other couples; no more solitary nights.

They'd only met six months ago and Jason had been away for three -- so half their relationship had been conducted down the phone. It seemed like forever since she'd seen him, held him, smelt him. She could hardly contain her excitement, skipping to her room to check her preparations for tonight.

Oh, tonight. Only a few hours away, and such a night it would be. It would be special, it would be memorable, it would be perfection.

With a happy smile and a light heart, Melissa headed out the door to spend another day bored out of her skull in a dead end job, but today even that seemed like a wonderful idea.

She was busy for most of the day, but any time there was a break in the work, Melissa found herself dreaming of the coming evening. Her excitement built as the work day wound down -- she had forgotten it was also Valentine's Day, unconscious of the store displays in her private joy. Then she was reminded - just after 2pm, she looked up from her work to see an enormous bunch of red roses coming towards her. There was a courier behind them, but she could barely see him. Of course they were from Jason, complete with cornball verse:

"Roses are red
Violets are blue
Tonight sweetheart
You'll be a woman too"

If you're a woman, I'm sorry but I hate you. It's not really your fault, more the fault of a select few. But if you have uterus I hate you.