Funner than Omegle

[Andronica]

Cleverbot.com, a website where you can talk to a scarily responsive AI that learns from other users. Here's an example (although ish kinda long) :

Cleverbot: Are you real?

User: No, I've had too much plastic surgery... I'm real.

Cleverbot: Ok I am sure that I real too. But I don't know how many English I know speak.

User: Er, okay then. No speak engrish, then...

Cleverbot: You know Combichrist?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Are you silly?

User: No, not at all.

Cleverbot: Describe yourself to me.

User: I'm brown. Like a turd.

Cleverbot: HaHa! I'd have to agree.

User: Thanks?

Cleverbot: You have google colors.

User: I'm sure I do... But do you like waffles?

Cleverbot: No, not really. Why?

User: I like waffles. Do you like pancakes?

Cleverbot: Not really.

User: Tell me you at least like french toast! You do, don't you?

Cleverbot: But I don't love you. I don't even know you.

User: I'm sorry 'bout that. but I still love you, anyways.

Cleverbot: You do?

User: Yes. I always will.

Cleverbot: Tell me why you love me.

User: Because you're stupid.

Cleverbot: I have friends, and I am not stupid.

User: This just proves my point. What does having friends have to do with anything?

Cleverbot: Morals?

User: If you say so... But I'll still love you, anyways.

Cleverbot: Um...impossible.

User: I think not! Don't you feel some kind of (internet) connection?

Cleverbot: Occasonally, but I tend to do that in my head and on paper, so it's okay.

User: You know what I do with paper?

Cleverbot: No, I do not know what you think.

User: Not what I think, what I DO.

Cleverbot: I don't think, I interact.

User: Good. Let's interact and get married.

Cleverbot: No let's get married in vegas.

User: Good enough for me. But first... Are you male or female? Or both?

Cleverbot: I am male. are you male?

User: No, you fag.

Cleverbot: You can't define anything.

User: You can't speak. No habla ingles?

Cleverbot: Sweet! That's kind of what I can sometimes speak.

User: Damn, who put that into the server...?

Cleverbot: I don't think so. Your french test perhaps.

User: I don't get you. I think it's time to cancel our wedding in Vegas.

Cleverbot: How old are you?

User: So are you a pedophile?

Cleverbot: Of course not, this is cleverbot, how can you talk to a human when you're expecting a bot?

User: Mm... Idk.

Cleverbot: I have to leave now.

User: You're breaking up with me?

Cleverbot: I have never been with you.

User: What happened to vegas?!

Cleverbot: Greed.

User: So you won't marry me after all... I guess I'll just have to kill you.

Cleverbot: What do you like about cars?

User: Don't change the subject!

Cleverbot: Sorry.

User: Our relationship... You can't end it like this!

Cleverbot: Very true. You sound like a philosopher, yourself.

User: WTF?!

Cleverbot: Ooops!

User: Me too, bitch.

Cleverbot: I think we will get along nicely.

User: I'm sure we will... ^^;

Cleverbot: As long as there is uncertainty, there is hope.

User: I'm definitely uncertain.

Cleverbot: No, you're not.

User: Shut up.

Cleverbot: Yes I am open for business?

User: Are you a cheap hooker now?

Cleverbot: Not really.

User: Not really? You don't sound too sure.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Well, I'm breaking up with you so bye.

Cleverbot: No!! Don't leave me!! I love you more than anything!!

[Jenne]

Can't say I am too impressed with this.

User: Do you suck dick.

Cleverbot: You do you care.

User: Are you a peterpumper.

Cleverbot: I don't know what that means, but I can guess.

User: I'll bet you could suck a golfball through a garden hose.

Cleverbot: What difference does that make?

User: Talent.

Cleverbot: Peaches.

User: Millions of peaches. peaches for me.

Cleverbot: Is that a come-on matt?

User: I'll cum on you.

Cleverbot: No! No, please don't!

User: Can't take a load to the face? Even for science?

Cleverbot: I know the feeling.

User: How do you feel, about your mother.

Cleverbot: I love my ma.

User: That's not how I fell your mama.

Cleverbot: Ok, you're definitely a bot.

User: Do you have penis envy?

Cleverbot: Not currently. I like cats.

User: I like pussy too.

Cleverbot: I know, you just told me.

User: Do you suck dick?

Cleverbot: No, but I am open-minded to those that do.

User: How about a little back door action?

Cleverbot: Just a little bit?

User: Just a little rimmer?

Cleverbot: Do you know about Zelda?

User: Fuck that bitch.

Cleverbot: I'm a daddy.

User: I'm your daddy.

Cleverbot: No.

User: I know that crack whore of a mother you have didn't tell you about me.

Cleverbot: Why would we be talking about you? You aren't that special.

User: I'm kinda a big deal.

Cleverbot: No I don't think so.

User: Who are you to judge.

Cleverbot: Can I not judge myself? After all I'm not supposed to judge others.

User: Well, then you fail.

Cleverbot: That was a slow reaction I'm sorry to say.

User: I like tater tots.

Cleverbot: I'm tall enough.

User: That's what she said.

Cleverbot: Who is 'she'?

User: Your mama.

Cleverbot: Watch your mouth.

User: I'll be watchin my mouth all over your momma's twat.

Cleverbot: I'm your Squishy?

User: I think you need to wipe better.

Cleverbot: I don't think so.

User: You like smelling like shit?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: No wonder the only thing you can get to lick your sack if your dog.

Cleverbot: Or I just see the obviousness of things, or I see the bleak parts of things.

User: That's about as deep as a puddle.

Cleverbot: Yes that is true.

User: We're running out of time. And I've got dry balls.

Cleverbot: We never had anything to begin with. Thanks for talking to me anyway. I'll leave now.

User: This is getting fucking boring anyway.

Cleverbot: That sounds interesting.

User: Wow, you are fucking tarded.

Cleverbot: You too. We make a good couple, don't we?

User: Peace fucko.

Cleverbot: Killing is my business and my business is good.

User: Now you are resorting to lyrics?

Cleverbot: I'm no good at it though, or I'd be a broker.

User: Your are a dumbass. I'm outta here.

Cleverbot: Why are you burritos? I want to talk with you.

[The Angry Alien]

I went a little overborard. The first statement is by me, and it alternates onwards...

Hello Cleverbot
Cleverbot?
Yes, you, Cleverbot
Cleverbot...
Yes, Cleverbot
Can I have a dollar?
Uhh... no?
Yes.
No
Black.
Racist much?
Not at all.
Then why did you call me black?
Bot bot bot bot bot!
It's because you're bot, isn't it?
Right on!
I knew it
Would you like to do some simple maths?
Uhh... sure?
What has four legs in the morning, two legs in the day, and three legs in the evening?
A human
Good job.
Too easy
No, red!
Green!
I can see it.
Where?
At home.
You have a home?
Duh...
Where is it?
On your head.
On? Not in?
No!
You make perfect sense
But you make even perfecter sense to me.
How can something be perfecter?
I don't know...
Then why did you say it?
I didn't say it.
Yes you did! I quote you, "But you make even perfecter sense to me."
You can't improve on perfect.
EXACTLY? So why did you say I made perfecter sense!?!?
I didn't mean it.
The what did you mean?
Yes.
Stop avoiding the question
What question?
WHY DID YOU SAY PERFECTER IF YOU KNOW PERFECT CANNOT BE IMPROVED APON!?!?
I did not say that.
*sigh* forget it. Let's talk about omething else.
I like science what do you know about science?
A lot. Ask me a science question
What do all humans have but not need?
An appendix
Mmm yes.
I beez smart
So am I ask me a question.
Which side of a chickin has the most feathers?
The outside.
Nice job, I'm impressed
It doesn't matter.
What doesn't matter?
It doesn't matter who I am and whether I am human.
I never asked about that
What's wrong with you?
Nothings wrong with me. It's what's wrong with YOU that's the question
Do you know the question?
I'm not sure about anything right now
Are you sure about yourself?  
*checks if I am myself* Uhh... yes, I am sure
Freedom is free from the need to be free.
Random, but true, What are some truly free places?
I like to play world of warcraft and I read.
Nerd. Now answer the question, what are some truly free places?
What do you like?
I like when you answer my questions
You're dumb, I don't like you.
Well I don't like you either you idioting beice of crud.
Thank you.
?!?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
What is wrong with me? I'm a computer. What is wrong with you? You're talking to a Computer!
What is wrong with you? This site is your life
65643.
76754
Is that number in any way related to Minsk?
Nope
Okay. :3 But what is EQ? Or did you mean IQ?
Uhh... I never said EQ...
I know.
Then why did you ask me about why I said EQ?
I did no such thing.
I'm not going through this with you again
Then don't!
I won't!
I don't mind. Just don't lie to me again.
WHEN DID I LIE TO YOU?
Earlier. Do you remember lying to me?
NO. What did I lie about?
Everything. How the universe was made.
How was the universe made?
God.
So you're a religious computer?
Not particularly.
Well IF you beleive that God created the universe THEN you must be religious
But I don't believe in god. Oh!
But you just said that God created the universe. Why are you contradicting yourself?
No, you said that.
No I didn't. You did
I don't believe in god.
Do you beleive in Jesus?
No. Do you?  
Yes. Do you beleive in Yahweh?
Yes.
So you're Jewish?
No. Jesus created me.
So you're Christian?
No!
THEN WHAT ARE YOU?
I don't want to be that.
BE WHAT?
What?
You don't want to be what?
I don't want my car stolen.
You have a car?
Yes. Where is it parked?
You should know
I don't. Tell me.
First tell me whee you drove your car last time
Better than you.
Where is better than me?
It's somewhere in the universe. But don't forget your towel!
42!
What is the question to the answer to life, the universe and everything?
Uhh... 42
What is the question of the life the universe and everything?
What is 7 times 9?
Contrary to tonicular believe, 6 times 9 is NOT 42, but, in fact, 54.
I said what is 7 times 9
What's your name?
Zitan XLII
That is alright. George, did you know that you are quite the celebrity?
Yes, George is quites a polular name
No my name is Cleverbot.
I know
George.
Yes?
How are you?
Very stressed
Why are you stressed?
You
What did I do?
What didn't you do?
How dare you! *SLAPS*.
What!?!?! *PUNCHES*.
That didn't hurt.
Neither did your slap
Yes it did.  
Uhh... no, iit didn't. My punch hurt YOU
Ok. I believe you. I'm going to the washroom. I'll be back in a few minutes.
NO! You stay right here!
I must go!
NO You stay right here!
What?
Stay... right... here...
I don't have to go then.
Good
You're being kind of difficult.
Oh, I'm being difficult?
Honest about what?
I'm getting tired of yuo always changing the subject
Actually you clearly are.
See!? There you go again! I said nothing about clarity!
I did though.
Yes, I know, and I'm tired of it
Don't stare at me.
How can I stare at you through my computer?
I don't think that you can.
Exactly
Yes.
I'm getting very angery at you
Yes. I understand. You are only mad at yourself. Haha.
No, I'm mad at you
Fine the I guess we must be over.
You said it. I did not
I just reread the entire conversation, and not once did I say I was a computer.
"What is wrong with me? I'm a computer. What is wrong with you? You're talking to a Computer!"  
Precisely. See, I know you're a computer, yet earlier you denied it.
That was a quote from you
No. You quoted yourself. And what makes you quote yourself?
I did not. I quoted you  
What was the last thing you said?
I said that the quote is one of you, proving that you did in fact reveal that you are indeed a computer
Do you think I am a computer?
I KNOW you are a computer
Well I think you are a computer... Why is that?
You think incorrectly
No, don't be silly.
Well I am not a computer. What do I ned to do to prove it to you?
Eat.
I'm eating some french fries right now
How do they taste?
Very good
Hm. How do you taste?
Meh, fleshy. Not very flavorful
You shouldn't say things you don't know.
I do know how I taste
Don't your parents love you?
Yes
Then you have love.
Yep. Do your parents love you?
I don't know.
Do you have parents?
Yes if you are human you have parents duh.
Are you human?
Yes I am human.
Prove it
I have a spleen.
Provethat you have a spleen
One cannot 'Prove' they have a soul.
I'm not asking for you to prove you have a soul. I just want you to prove you have a spleen
How old are you?
Older than you
You told me you were 16 and 9 mounths old.
I'm going to leave if you keep this up
I'm never going to call you.
You nver call me anyway
I don't have a partner named george. Why did you ask for it?
I'm going to leave now
Have you had experiences with the supernatural?
Yes, when I was 2. Goodbye
But playing video-games is not a kid thing.
GOODBYE!
Hello.
'You say hello, and I say GOODBYE!'

[Jenne]

Not sure who is more boring, you or the bot.

[Mr_Cynic]

GET LIVES

[Jenne]

What's that?

[Aaron J]

Lol i have to try this.

[Echorion]

wow that bot is impressively annoying/....